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02-01-2012 Hogspore Community News Somewhere up or down out on the main highway, depending on whether you’re coming or going. Ready fer Groundhog Day? Groundhog Day is celerbrated a bit different than the rest of the country. Tomorrow on February 2, the Hogspore townfolk carry their market-ready Razorbacks to Sammy the butcher’s place. Sammy grinds them all up and makes sausage out of em … the hogs, not the townfolk. There’s a TV commercial out there running for a nose swelling remedy product. There’s a sick woman in bed. Sitting on the nightstand is Mucous Man. The 180 pound talking Drip-Droid says, “It ain’t my fault that this lady has nasal congestion, or that the country has money problems, or that most all of the Middle East hates us. Asia Minor is so hot and dry they’d probably appreciate a might more mucous.” Maybe the Mucous Mutant is right, but if I woke up late at night and saw Mr. Drippy hunkered down on the bed table, it would, for sure, scare the snot out of me. I wouldn’t shoot him though cause we just put up new bedroom wallpaper. The city council was contemplating a ban on texting while driving. The new law weren’t approved cause 4 of the council members thought it weren’t fair to include mules and buckboards in the new law. Course, there ain’t many folks driving a buckboard or riding atop a mule that’s gonna be using a cell phone, cept maybe to call a broker to execute a stock option. The town council wound up passing a law that says a feller can’t be driving while he’s napping. All this commotion about texting come up after the Farmer Beige incident. He was running his tractor and phone texting at the same time. Before you can say, “The catfish and hushpuppies are ready,” Farmer Beige had plowed four rows of cabbage into coleslaw. Don’t forget to also celerbrate Ballerina Day tomorrow, February second. By Clet Litter as told to Bob Simpson at WWW.Hogspore.com |
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